Becoming a mother..

"I knew motherhood would be hard, but I didn't know it would be THIS hard. And I knew I would love it, but I had no idea I could love it THIS much. " The hardest and my most favorite thing... I am currently typing while trying to bounce my squirmy 2 month old; My multitasking skills have become pretty amazing. This is just one of the few things I have learned to do in these last 2 months.

My baby is now 4 months old. I typed that last paragraph 2 months ago. I was able to work on it on and off. I would randomly send texts to myself when I thought of something I wanted to write about. Life gets crazy busy with a new baby and it gets so hard to prioritize the things you used to love to do. I want to get better at that, so here I go. I have been able to catch up on some sleep this last month. My baby now only wakes up once a night... Hallelujah! I never thought the day would come. So it is probably a good thing I have waited until now to write my blog because who knows if I would have made any sense before.

I knew motherhood would be hard, but I didn't know it would be THIS hard. And I knew I would love it, but I had no idea I could love it THIS much. Purple crier, colic, high maintenance baby. These are just some of the words I've heard my baby described as. They say give it time. Well… It had been three months of non stop bouncing, crying, and experimentation. (Formula, medicine, probiotic drops, chiropractor) how much more time? Because I was exhausted.

My three month old liked to pretend he was a newborn sometimes waking up every hour of the night. Wanting to eat every hour and a half. At that point, I did not think time would fix anything because it had been 3 months and NOTHING had changed.

I don't know how anyone could do this alone. I have so many people helping me and I'm still so dang tired at the end of the day… I'm so tired right when I wake up. My husband has helped me more than I could ask for. He helped at night all of the time and he still works full time. He has his real estate license and the first year is the hardest with that. He has been working overtime, plus he works in a special education classroom at the high school. So I know he is exhausted. All I can say is that he is amazing, and I am EXTREMELY blessed. Even though the first three months were so hard, my little baby boy‘s smile made it worth it, and continues to do so everyday. Him grabbing my hand makes it worth it. HE makes it worth it. I love him more than I can explain. I didn't know this kind of love existed...

I've got a lot of stories to share and things that I have learned. I debated with the idea of putting them all on here or creating a different blog with all of them on it. I am going to go with a different blog so this one doesn’t get too lengthy. I have learned so much, but I know I still have SOO much more to learn. Every day something new pops up and I have decided that is just how life goes. You have to learn to roll with the punches and embrace the changes.

Life changes. Live it. Love it.